


SPN Coda 15x05 - "Proverbs 17:3"

by heylittleangel



Series: Supernatural Codas - Season 15 [6]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angst, Cas is suffering, Emotional Hurt, He Just Wants His Family, Hurt, Hurt No Comfort, my poor baby
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-16
Updated: 2019-11-16
Packaged: 2021-02-07 07:16:23
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,001
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21454132
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/heylittleangel/pseuds/heylittleangel
Summary: Hey, peeps! So, this coda wasn't so late like the other one. I really enjoyed the episode, really took me by surprise, and, obviously, I had to write Cas in. I hope you enjoy it!
Series: Supernatural Codas - Season 15 [6]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1513883
Kudos: 18





	SPN Coda 15x05 - "Proverbs 17:3"

**Author's Note:**

> Hey, peeps! So, this coda wasn't so late like the other one. I really enjoyed the episode, really took me by surprise, and, obviously, I had to write Cas in. I hope you enjoy it!

Castiel wakes up covered in cold sweat, the sheets of the motel bed scratching his skin uncomfortably. He pants as his eyes adjust to the low light in the room, trying to ground himself and forget the last traces of his nightmare. They’ve been getting worse with each passing and, as his grace burns up, it gets harder to wake up from them; it gets harder to know what’s real and what isn’t.

He lets himself sink against the bed again, sighing as he places one arm on top of his eyes. He can’t shake the shivering as his skin cools down, pulling the sheets up in an attempt of warming himself; a useless attempt.

Castiel stares at his closed eyelids, mind numb and body shivering, not sure of what to do; he can’t fall asleep again but getting up isn’t looking promising either. It’s not like he has something to do anyway, nothing but an empty road that leads to nowhere and that gets him farther and farther away from the only home he knows.

The ringtone of his phone interrupts his thoughts, making Castiel take his arm off his eyes to see the daylight shining right on top of them. _ When did the morning come? _ He blinks a few times against it before reaching for his phone on the nightstand, squinting to be able to read the notifications. There are a lot of texts from Sam, all of them asking if Castiel’s okay and where he is and when is he going to go back to the bunker. _ Guess Dean didn’t tell him the truth yet. Probably never will _ . Castiel scoffs as he rolls his eyes. _ Shouldn’t be surprised by it. _There are also missed calls and voice mails that Castiel deletes without listening to.

He also deletes the texts before staring at Dean’s name on top of the screen, nothing but empty silence from him ever since Castiel left, which isn’t surprising at all. Castiel stares at it for a while, phone gripped tight in his hand until it starts to hurt. He lets the phone fall on his chest with a sigh, rubbing a hand on his face. He leaves the phone on the bed as he stands up, starting to grab all of his things and put them inside his duffel. It doesn’t take long; it’s not like he has a lot of things and he didn’t exactly have time to grab what he had in the bunker before leaving.

His phone rings once again as Castiel puts his trenchcoat, stopping him mid-movement. He walks to the bed as he soothes the wrinkles on the coat, unlocking to see a text from Dean. Castiel’s heart skips a beat as he stares at it, reading it fastly as a logging feeling sets on his heart, squeezing it tightly.

~❤~❤~

_ Cas, I know I don’t deserve to do this, that I _ shouldn’t _ be doing this, but I don’t know what else to do; I don’t know who else to talk to. I thought everything was over, that Chuck had left for good and that we were going to finally be free, to be able to do what _ we _ wanted to, but he’s not gone. Chuck’s still manipulating us, forcing us to do what _ he _ wants us to. I don’t even know what’s real anymore, if everything I said to you was really me or if it was all Chuck. It doesn’t excuse what I did, I know it doesn’t, but still…I don’t know what else to do anymore. I miss you and I hope you’re okay. Be careful. Lilith’s back and I don’t think Chuck’s gonna give up anytime soon. I know you can take care of yourself but be careful, please. I know I don’t say it enough but I love you. _

Dean’s words replay in Castiel’s mind as he drives, holding the wheel tightly between his hands, tears prickling in his eyes as he fights them. He deleted the text as soon as he finished reading it, turning his phone off right after and burying it deep in his duffel bag, far away from his vision. He doesn’t even know where he’s going, letting his body work on its own. He barely even pays attention to the road, all of his attention in dissecting Dean’s text and trying to find anything more on it. He knows he should be worried about Chuck still being on Earth or about Lilith coming back, but both are too distant for him to worry for now.

Castiel only notices where he’s on when he parks outside of a big, white house, a sheriff’s truck parked outside, along with two other cars. Ha parks his own by their side, cutting the engine off as he stares at the house. He can see people walking inside of it through the windows, Claire and Alex arguing about something—as they usually are—, Jody working on something and Patience sitting on the couch as she reads. A soft smile comes to Castiel’s lips before he opens the door of the car. His steps are slightly dragged as he walks to the house, knocking on the front door a few times. He hears Claire screaming that she’s coming right before she screams something at Alex, her footsteps following.

Her expression is of surprise when she opens the door and sees Castiel. “What are you doing here?”

Castiel buries his hands on the trenchcoat, shrugging. “I…didn’t have anywhere else to go.”

Claire’s expression softens and she opens the door wider. “C’mon, you look like a dog that just got kicked off the moving truck.” Castiel smiles sadly as he enters the house, Claire closing the door before hugging him. “Jody will be happy to see you.”

The atmosphere in the house is of a family and Castiel realizes that the road wasn’t him leading to nowhere after all; it was actually leading him to his family and he couldn’t be more grateful for having them.

**Author's Note:**

> As always, you can find me on [ tumblr](https://gii-heylittleangel.tumblr.com/)


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